Confession - I am a pattern addict

This weekend I was reading Jennifer's latest blog post about her TMPTMF syndrome, too many patterns/too much fabric, for those of you not in the "know".  This got me wondering, "Do I also have TMPTMF?" I certainly have A LOT of fabric and my "to buy" pattern list never comes to an end. These seem like the only criteria needed to contract TMPTMF.

But haven given it so more thought, it seems that TMPTMF is not my problem.  First there is never too much fabric, only too little storage space. When my husband says my stash has everything I can accurately tell him the holes it has that currently need to be filled. (Solid knit colors and cheaper black jersey. I ain't sewing up that milk/silk blend that cost 28 bucks a yard into T-shirts honey.)  Second, I'm always jonesing for new patterns. Show me something new, something interesting, some new designer, some garment I didn't know I needed, or that exact garment I really want a pattern for.  MOARRRRR Patterns baby, I need a hit! OK guys, I'm just gonna say it.  "Hello my name is Heather and I am a pattern addict."

It takes a lot of factors for a pattern to become a finished garment in this house.  A pattern is always in danger of being replaced by another that is new and shiny. One that hasn't yet revealed that it's gonna need 3 muslins to fit right. One that is a super exciting garment. Or maybe life just benches a pattern for awhile and I don't feel like picking it back up again.  My pattern buying/making cycle goes something like this..... if it was a choose your own adventure book

1. See new pattern, think "OMG Take My Money and give me that pattern."  Order and dance with glee. Probably tweet about said pattern purchase, cause you guys need to know that I have procured more pattern goodness.  All the patterns Heather keeping up her reputation!

2. Excitingly waiting for pattern to arrive. I don't want to sew any of this stuff on my table right now, all I want to sew is that pattern that is NOT HERE YET. Oh god why? *Lurk around front of the house for mail man to show up.* Maybe I need to search the internet for more patterns.....just to fill the time.

3. Pattern is here!  Happy Happy Joy Joy! Open package and ...
a. happily start tracing.
b. suddenly don't want to sew it anymore. Some new pattern has appeared and all I can think about is that one. Fickle sewcialist I put it in the downstairs pattern drawer. Maybe someday I'll decide to sew it after all...or maybe it will get moved to the upstairs box.  Oh no pattern graveyard!

Don't worry patterns, I still want to sew you if you're in this drawer.

4. For patterns that I trace it's now first muslin time. That carefree time where I'm sure everything will fit just fine with my regular pattern tweaks.  Try muslin on and...
a. Muslin does fit fine! I will ignore new patterns and continue making this garment.
b. Muslin fits OK, but needs second muslin. "You have displeased me pattern, sit in time out while I decide whether to replace you with that awesome new pattern I saw in the net."
c. Muslin fits like crap.  Actively purchase new pattern while throwing the other in the pattern graveyard. "That will teach you!"

This Bellatrix muslin is in time out only cause I'm busy not cause it's naughty. Poor baby.

5. Happy Pattern, you've made it through my muslin stage and will now be cut out in real fabric.  But wait, your perils are not over for my pattern eye is always wandering. I fire up the sewing machine and....
a. Sewing goes quickly and without any major hair pulling moments. Maybe I even have a period drama to watch so I don't put off hand hemming for a week.  You are now a finished garment. Achievement Unlocked!
b. Sewing starts dragging and I start thinking about new shiny patterns that won't make me set sleeves twice. Maybe you are lucky pattern and I have chosen a nice fabric that makes me continue on in my efforts.  But the clock is ticking and you best be finished before an Indy designer releases a new collection.
c. Sewing becomes a grueling slog of ripped out seams and on the fly adjustments.  I am covered with ripped out bits of thread and have probably stabbed myself with some shears. My eyes glaze over and I see new patterns dancing in their glossy envelops/hipster environmentally friendly packaging that promise me all sorts of things.  I can't help myself, I'm a slutty pattern addict and I reach for a new one. Pattern you have failed me and your garment is resigned to a box. *Cue sad horn*

Actually this is a perfectly good Archer that is just waiting for some sewing time. Love you Archer pattern! Smooches.

So any you got some new patterns? You do? Meet me in the alley behind my house in 10 minutes. I'll bring the Christmas cookies, you bring the pattern. *Puts pattern envelope to my nose and sniffs* Ahhhhh yeah, that's the good stuff.