12.09.2013

Confession - I am a pattern addict

This weekend I was reading Jennifer's latest blog post about her TMPTMF syndrome, too many patterns/too much fabric, for those of you not in the "know".  This got me wondering, "Do I also have TMPTMF?" I certainly have A LOT of fabric and my "to buy" pattern list never comes to an end. These seem like the only criteria needed to contract TMPTMF.

But haven given it so more thought, it seems that TMPTMF is not my problem.  First there is never too much fabric, only too little storage space. When my husband says my stash has everything I can accurately tell him the holes it has that currently need to be filled. (Solid knit colors and cheaper black jersey. I ain't sewing up that milk/silk blend that cost 28 bucks a yard into T-shirts honey.)  Second, I'm always jonesing for new patterns. Show me something new, something interesting, some new designer, some garment I didn't know I needed, or that exact garment I really want a pattern for.  MOARRRRR Patterns baby, I need a hit! OK guys, I'm just gonna say it.  "Hello my name is Heather and I am a pattern addict."

It takes a lot of factors for a pattern to become a finished garment in this house.  A pattern is always in danger of being replaced by another that is new and shiny. One that hasn't yet revealed that it's gonna need 3 muslins to fit right. One that is a super exciting garment. Or maybe life just benches a pattern for awhile and I don't feel like picking it back up again.  My pattern buying/making cycle goes something like this..... if it was a choose your own adventure book

1. See new pattern, think "OMG Take My Money and give me that pattern."  Order and dance with glee. Probably tweet about said pattern purchase, cause you guys need to know that I have procured more pattern goodness.  All the patterns Heather keeping up her reputation!

2. Excitingly waiting for pattern to arrive. I don't want to sew any of this stuff on my table right now, all I want to sew is that pattern that is NOT HERE YET. Oh god why? *Lurk around front of the house for mail man to show up.* Maybe I need to search the internet for more patterns.....just to fill the time.

3. Pattern is here!  Happy Happy Joy Joy! Open package and ...
a. happily start tracing.
b. suddenly don't want to sew it anymore. Some new pattern has appeared and all I can think about is that one. Fickle sewcialist I put it in the downstairs pattern drawer. Maybe someday I'll decide to sew it after all...or maybe it will get moved to the upstairs box.  Oh no pattern graveyard!
Don't worry patterns, I still want to sew you if you're in this drawer.
4. For patterns that I trace it's now first muslin time. That carefree time where I'm sure everything will fit just fine with my regular pattern tweaks.  Try muslin on and...
a. Muslin does fit fine! I will ignore new patterns and continue making this garment.
b. Muslin fits OK, but needs second muslin. "You have displeased me pattern, sit in time out while I decide whether to replace you with that awesome new pattern I saw in the net."
c. Muslin fits like crap.  Actively purchase new pattern while throwing the other in the pattern graveyard. "That will teach you!"
This Bellatrix muslin is in time out only cause I'm busy not cause it's naughty. Poor baby.
5. Happy Pattern, you've made it through my muslin stage and will now be cut out in real fabric.  But wait, your perils are not over for my pattern eye is always wandering. I fire up the sewing machine and....
a. Sewing goes quickly and without any major hair pulling moments. Maybe I even have a period drama to watch so I don't put off hand hemming for a week.  You are now a finished garment. Achievement Unlocked!
b. Sewing starts dragging and I start thinking about new shiny patterns that won't make me set sleeves twice. Maybe you are lucky pattern and I have chosen a nice fabric that makes me continue on in my efforts.  But the clock is ticking and you best be finished before an Indy designer releases a new collection.
c. Sewing becomes a grueling slog of ripped out seams and on the fly adjustments.  I am covered with ripped out bits of thread and have probably stabbed myself with some shears. My eyes glaze over and I see new patterns dancing in their glossy envelops/hipster environmentally friendly packaging that promise me all sorts of things.  I can't help myself, I'm a slutty pattern addict and I reach for a new one. Pattern you have failed me and your garment is resigned to a box. *Cue sad horn*
Actually this is a perfectly good Archer that is just waiting for some sewing time. Love you Archer pattern! Smooches.
So any you got some new patterns? You do? Meet me in the alley behind my house in 10 minutes. I'll bring the Christmas cookies, you bring the pattern. *Puts pattern envelope to my nose and sniffs* Ahhhhh yeah, that's the good stuff.

38 comments:

  1. I get a loud *sadhorn* when I want all the patterns and all the fabric and can only buy one piece of fabric. Gah! Stupid money tree isn't working!!

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  2. O..M..G..!! You just totally explained my life. I too must have ALL the patterns!! Some days it feels like I have pattern A.D.D.
    I have even got so far as fabric shopping with a list of fabric requirements for specific patterns - unfortunately that list with matched fabric is getting reeaaaalllllly long too. Too many shiny new pattern offerings

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  3. ahhhh too funny! while i certainly covet ALL the patterns, a tight budget always reins me in. :)

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  4. This is my life, except that now that I'm back at work I seem to get stuck in the buying patterns stage over and over like a broken record without ever making it into the muslin/sewing stage. Stoopid work getting in the way of my crafting... maybe I need a new pattern to feel better about that. So there.

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  5. hahaha... love your mind, Heather. I must be resistant to this strain because I haven't had the urge to buy more fabric or more patterns for some 6-8 months now. I started displaying my fabric on the shelves in my sewing room - so everytime I go in I can drool over my stash and daydream about what they're going to be sewn up as. My stash currently could provide about 3 lifetimes of sewing goodness. I want more TIME, dammit!

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  6. guilty as charged - I'm in the alley as we speak.. I know I'll never have the time to make up all the patterns in my stash, but that's a time constraint …. surely it is … ;)

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  7. Stephanie RamaekersDecember 10, 2013 at 3:18 AM

    Totally guilty except mine usually get stuck at the tracing stage. So I keep buying new fabrics to pair with new patterns but I haven't got any room to trace the damn things so they just lie around, waiting! I do actually have 2 patterns traced but I haven't got any room to lay out the fabric either (floor is no option due to babybump) so i'm stuck. Maybe I should just get it over with, so I have something to do when I want to take a break from grading exams these coming 2 weeks.
    I do admire you for the muslins though... I never seem to get round to those...

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  8. Your mind works in mysterious ways Heather... PS. Yesterday evening I found THREE new patterns in my mailbox...

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  9. MOAR PATTERNS! i definitely buy more patterns than fabric - i only buy fabric when i have something in mind for it (or the charity shop delivers). but i have been lucky with wins, sales and vintage buys so i am trying to sew those up before i buy more!

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  10. I don't have that many patterns, actually. If I don't think I am going to make the pattern more than once I try not to buy it. I try to be practical and frugal, but I wonder if I just really need MOAR patterns :-). I certainly need more fabric. My stash fit into two rubbermaid storage totes.

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  11. This post cracked me up, I wish I were half as hilarious as you! Patterns are certainly fun, but your symptoms are more like my fabric lust. Sadly, I only get to look at it and maybe pet it if it's not online....too many other things like pre-move remodeling projects and mortgage payments take up all the fabric budget lately. *BOO*

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  12. Hilarious, you are. I'm not there yet, although my pattern wishlist is definitely getting longer and longer. And that might be due to a certain somebody. Naming no names (starts with H, rhymes with "eather").

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  13. Until I joined the blogging world I didn't have such a problem with wanting patterns.... Yes I'm looking at YOU Heather! I think I'm more of a fabric addict. I can always find an excuse to buy more fabric.
    Occasionally TMITMF (too many ideas too much fabric) sets in when I start sifting through the piles and realize how much work is actually there. I've found a list and setting aside a little bit of time each day helps me from getting overwhelmed and gets things achieved.

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  14. Money tree, why you now grow? Maybe cause you want to be fertilized with money. *Sad Horn*

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  15. Yes pattern A.D.D. is the perfect explanation! Do you buy several pieces of fabric for the same pattern or is that just me?

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  16. You are very good for my budget should rein me in but often does not.

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  17. This is a common problem, we just need to get the sewing commune funded so that we don't need to work. More sewing time for everyone!

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  18. Such restraint, you are a model to all of us! More time, I would like that also. :)

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  19. Yesssss, I'm grabbing the cookies. MOAR Patterns! Then we just have to ignore food making and cleaning for more sewing time.

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  20. That is rough, I didn't do any sewing while pregnant for similar reasons. You need a cutting assistant for the short term.

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  21. Now I have U2 in my head. ;) Three new patterns hooray!!! I do tend to buy one indie at a time too. But then a week later I forget and buy another one.

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  22. I'm very jealous of you guys with charity shops that have awesome fabric in them. No such thing in my neck of the woods. Even with all your patterns it sounds like you are being good and sewing them up. High five!

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  23. You are also the ideal that we addicts should aspire too. Two rubbermade containers? That's just my knit stash. ;)

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  24. Fabric lust, that sounds like a problem that might dog me as well. It's not my fault all the pretties want to come home with me. :) I'm sad that your fabric money is being eaten by your house...but then it seems mine might be doing the same. :(

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  25. I'm a bad influence and should be separated from society. ;)

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  26. Oh no, I've given you the pattern lust too. Bad bad sewcialist. I also have that feeling when I pull all the fabric out. How did so much get in this closet?!

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  27. children??, where did they come from? Can they tape .pdfs together yet?? … bring them back when they can...

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  28. Can't they just forage for food in the cabinet? Crackers for dinner, it's what they want anyway.

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  29. When you are, can I have your patterns? And/or fabric? Not picky.

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  30. Girl, you crack me up! (I'm new here.)

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  31. Hi Gail, welcome to crazy town! I'm glad that you've found this amusing. :)

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  32. I'll have to split it up lottery style amongst all the twitter girls. LOL

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  33. Next year Heather, Next year

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  34. Shit are we up to me already ... my name is Sandra and I am a pattern addict. But I must say that I am not looking for an intervention but looking for more time in my life to sew them all! Sadly I have to work to feed my addiction! Vicious sewing circle.

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  35. Next year you're gonna come to my house and steal all my patterns? I thought we were friends Trice, Friends! ;)

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  36. LOL! We're not going to rehab, just give us the patterns and no one gets hurt!

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  37. LOL, I am the pattern burglary. I have mastered the skill of slide and drop (into bag). Thanks for the invite, I'll bring sweets to distract you from my purpose.
    Hehe, Actually I was gonna meet you in the back alley and give you a new indie designer pattern but yeah. Friends ;)

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  38. You've got my number Trice. I'd be chowing down on the sweets and you could loot my entire stash. How about we just trade in the back alley instead?

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