Coming to an imaginary theater near you.....

6.18.2014

(Beginning of movie voice over by that guy who does all the "In a world..." movie trailers.)
In 2009 John Rambo was killed by terrorists, but not before the government had taken samples of his DNA. Concerned with homeland security, the government assembled a crack team of scientists and tasked them with top secret project "First Blood." The goal of the project was to clone fully grown super soldiers from Rambo's DNA. *The project was going well until a fluke lab accident damaged the Y chromosome on the source DNA.  Unable to make carbon copy clones of John Rambo, the team came up with a different plan. They would make a female super solider, one that was as good with a gun as she was with a needle.......and so Jessica Rambo was born.

(Cut to first person narrative from our hero Jessica Rambo)
Returning to my quarters from a kali training session, I found a message from central command.  Major Seamstress Erin had sent down orders for my next assignment. I was to join the top secret mission classifed as The Rambo Project.
Command would be sending me a turban from one of my "father's" prior missions in order that I create suitable garments for tracking down my next target. More instructions were coming in the mail so be prepared.  I cleaned my gun and sharpened my Gingers, now I was ready for anything.

The package arrive a few days later containing 3/4 of a turban and a note written in code to inform me to my next target.  As I removed the turban from it's wrappings I was stuck with a sense of deja vu. Hadn't I seen this turban being worn before?  Had I ripped it into pieces with my gunfire?
A hazy image flickered in my mind.....but no, that wasn't me. No matter, I had orders to obey.
My fabric yardage was limited but I'd make it work, just like Sargent Gunn had always told me. My brain rifled through the possibilities and it became clear that there was only one that would serve my needs. I was a warrior queen and would dress like one.  I ordered Private Froggie to get out the pattern from the Craftsy Bombshell dress class.  A little extra explosive power comes in handy in my line of work.
We worked through the night, carefully considering stripe placement and irregularities in the fabric.  Private Froggie threw his paws up in the air in disgust more than once, but I told him not to despair. **Once you've had to make garments out of stockings and clear vinyl, then turban garments are a cake walk.
My original plan was to attach shorts to the bustier, for those times I have to run through the jungle exchanging sniper fire with masked bandits. Sadly, it was discovered that there was not enough yardage to cut shorts that would cover my "muscular" backside.  Private Froggie and I did some quick calculations and drafted up a mini skirt that would make the most of our remaining fabric.
After sewing the skirt to the bustier and putting in a zipper, I sent Private Froggie off to fill up my bandoleers. One with bullets, the other with red lipstick. While he was doing that, I made up a bustier lining and sewed in featherlight boning to help the garment retain it's shape.  My plastic boning stores came up a bit short, so we had to close up the lining and hope for the best.
I put on my poisoned red lipstick and shoes with hidden knives in the soles to go get photographic evidence that the first part of my mission had been completed. Private Froggie stopped me and said that the ensemble was missing one thing. He pulled out a red head band and I knew he was right, a true Rambo always wears red.
As I tied on my head band I told Private Froggie to saddle up, it was time to hit our target.  Look out evil doers, we're coming for you.
Need more Rambo?  Check out the ladies who have already posted their Rambo projects.
Oona of OonaBalloona La Wrambette
Sonja of Ginger Makes - Swingy Summer Top
Shams of Communing with Fabric – Jeans Style Jacket
Tempest of Fanbloomingtastic - John Rambo’s Worst Nightmare
Lauren of Lladybird - Slutty Bralette
Leila of Three Dresses Project- Hummingbird Skirt
Keep checking back on Seamstress Erin's announcement page for new links to go live.

* Blatant rip off of X-23. Sorry fellow Marvel fans.
** True story, I had a college course similar to the Project Runway challenges where they have to make garments out of candy or random things you find at the store. Sadly I have no photographic evidence of these garments.
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