Turning 40 - A Review


Hey guess what?  It's officially my 40th birthday day!   I've been celebrating all month because a "birthday month" is a thing and I'm secretly dramatic. Or maybe that's not a secret. Does a not dramatic person wear a hat like this?   No girl, they probably don't wear hats at all....poor hat-less bastards.
It's been awhile since we had a purely silly blog post, what with me not actually blogging and all.  I thought this might be a fun way to commemorate my 40th birthday. Also my sewing mojo has taken a mini-vacation leaving me with lots of time to do other stuff.  Like write random blog posts, search for reasonably priced bakelite and eat too much chocolate.  (Desmond's leftover Easter candy is in peril.) So let's have some fun with my edited review temple below. Don't worry, there's still a husband comment.

Pattern   Age
The big 40. Officially middle aged? Or halfway to becoming my true self? Basically a crotchety old lady who knits, eats cookies and only watches PBS dramas of Jane Austen novels. (We're just going to pretend my real true self isn't a "V" lizard human intent on using the rest of you for fuel.)  Honestly I'm just relieved to be back at an age that I can remember.  Try remembering that you're 37 for a year. It's impossible.

Fabrics used  Influences
This 40 year old self is brought to you by... avoiding social interactions to read too many books. Being raised on so many old movies that my teenage crushes were Clark Gable, Charlton Heston and Yul Brynner. (That is not a joke) Copious ingestion of cake, cookies and chocolate bars. And finally filling my brain with so many song lyrics that I spontaneously start singing something 95% of the time. My family loooooves this.  (No they don't.)

Baby Heather.  I'm just giving you this one to show that I arrived on this planet with more hair than was necessary. Now we're fast forwarding to where I started dressing myself and it's scary.

Child who wore too many things her grandmother bought at "Cow Town"  Wait, I'm just now finding out there's a rodeo there?  Shit, I would have enjoyed a rodeo more than factory seconds bought on the cheap.

That stage where I was too big to fit into kids clothing but for some reason didn't fit into teenager clothing?  All I remember is having to buy clothing from the middle aged ladies department. You make a lot of friends in middle school that way. (No you don't.)

The early 90's vest phase.  I don't remember having a vest phase but I just counted 4 different vest outfits section of the photo album. And that's the only the outfits my Mother thought to take a picture of.  Confession - I've been thinking about sewing a vest for about 4 months now. Would this be a vest reboot?

Mid 90's ill advised flannel shirt semi grunge phase.  Nothing like totally obscuring your waist so you look 20lbs heavier.

Late 90's phase when I wore khakis and T-shirt from surf shops. I have no idea why this happened. I hate the beach and am very unathletic.  Was this just a late 90's trend? You can see my friend Steve's outfit is equally bland so maybe it was. Oh and we used to be somewhat tan.  We're still friends but we don't tan. We just text each other about how much we hate the sun.... exactly 2 weeks ago. (We both decided to clean our houses instead. Just call us the life of the party!)

Early Aughts "I have to train people older than me for a living so I buy everything from J Crew" phase. That one explains itself.

Late Aughts "I'm cold all the time but can afford to buy a lot of cashmere turtlenecks" phase. This is when I met Mr. B.

2012 - Post Desmond and when I started sewing again.

2018 - Gasp the Present!

Confessions/Advice  Pros/Cons
Pros of being 40
- I used to be really concerned about "What Other People Thought!" in my younger years.  Now I don't give a damn.  It's really wonderful and freeing.

- On a related note my decision to become the local eccentric is working out really well.  I've always been a weird lone wolf on the edges of society.  Now I'm also well dressed and confidently wearing a killer hat while doing my own thing.  Most people seem to like it.
Cons of being 40
- I spend a fair amount of time on Youtube looking for stretches to fix various muscle knots. Have I been using my body incorrectly for 40 years?  The answer is yes. Oh and I take a lot of supplements now and fiber.  All of you in your 20's and 30's enjoy not worrying about your fiber intake while you can.

- I have turned into that adult who goes, "OH MY GOD, YOU'VE GOTTEN SO BIG!"  God I hated that person when I was a kid.  Also things are "too sweet" or "too rich" now.  And I wear leopard print which I swore never to do.  Oh well, I'm owning it now.  Kids grow up too fast, those marshmallow peeps are way too sweet and leopard print rules. Soft kitty, round kitty, little pile of fluff.

Husband Family Comments
Husband - "I noticed that you're a lot hotter than many of the 40 year olds I know."

Son - "I don't really care, Carver's Mom is way older than you." (Who's Carver? Husband Steve says he's one of Desmond's classmates.  Really? the only one I can remember is Sal because his grandfather looks like, and I quote Des -"One of those rich guys who look poor." Me - "Do you mean stereotypical Italian movie mobsters?"  Des- "YES!")

Froggie - "I do hope you're still sharing the chocolate cake."

My Final Thoughts
I'd like to thank my mother for her "young face" genes. She used to win us prizes at the "guess my age" attraction at the fair every time. Also my younger self for starting to use sunscreen in her early 20's.  Oh and my vampire eyes that keep me from going out in the sun period.  HISSS, IT BURNS! Where is my sun hat and two pairs of sunglasses!? (Also not a joke.)

Other than my face vanity I'm pretty happy with this whole getting older thing. Younger me spent a lot of time trying to be something I'm not. A socially normal person. And no one bought it because it's obvious that I'm not that.  As a semi-close relative told me in 2012, "Well you've always been odd, but not in a bad way."  I'm a lot happier now that I've embraced my oddness with as much bright colors and hats as possible.

I think that's enough introspection for one day. Let's all sit down have some cake and talk about summer sewing plans. :)

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